The Cost of Discipleship

Salvation costs you nothing, but discipleship will cost you everything. Salvation occurs in a moment, but discipleship takes a lifetime. Jesus asks whether or not you truly want to live a life of discipleship. If you are a disciple, do not quit. Everything that matters is hard. Everything that matters is costly. Do not quit. Don’t waste your life. Make your death count. Do not raise your hand unless you’re ready to see it through to the end.  

-Pastor Mark Driscoll

The moment I asked Christ to come into my life, I was saved.  That very moment my place in heaven was guaranteed.  But what was next?  What was I supposed to do until that time comes? 

In Romans 6, Paul talks about sin and the person we were before our new life in Christ.  We live in the freedom of God's grace and are free from the bondage of sin.  So the answer is to rid yourself of your old ways and completely give yourself to God.  Every part of you.  Every area of your life.  Use your life to glorify God and bring others to know Christ.  Be a disciple of Christ. 

In Matthew 28:18-20, Christ tells us to "go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.  Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

Discipleship. 
Take up your cross and follow Him. 
Die to yourself and live for Christ.

Sound easy?  Not quite.  We are filled with our own human desires and surrounded by a culture that fuels those desires with everything you could want at your fingertips.  When you make the choice to follow God's plan you are putting aside your own desires and placing your trust in God.  This doesn't mean you will have an easy life, but it does mean that Christ will always be with you...in the good times and the bad.

At the beginning of this year, I took time to fast and pray over God's plan for my life.  Throughout the month, I felt God's presence as I continuously prayed and listened.  The time I spent with him was indescribable, the closeness was intense, and the clarity He gave me was mind-blowing!  (One day I will write about my experience) I was filled with peace and joy as He showed me the path he had laid out for my family and me.  Knowing His plan would bring changes in our lives, I wholeheartedly decided to follow God's plan and held tightly to what Christ said:  "I am with you always...".  I was on top of the mountain, in the presence of God, following HIS will. 

Then came the storms of life.  

Spiritual warfare, opposition, personal attacks, and accusations.  Anything to knock me off the path that God had laid out for me.  Thankfully, I wasn't naive in thinking that "as long as I follow God's plan, everything will be peachy".  I've done a bible study on spiritual warfare in the past and read that the devil attacks those close to God.  Both Christ and Paul both warn of persecution of followers of Christ.  Be prepared.  Many people have the impression (as I once did), that as long as you follow Christ then it will be smooth sailing from then on.  Brace yourself...that's FALSE!  God never said it would be easy. He said He would be with you.  Keep your feet on God's path and have faith in knowing that he will guide you through the darkness. 

During the the time I spent seeking God and his plan, unbeknownst to me, He was preparing me for what was to come.  He filled me with strength, patience, and understanding.  Three things that have been vital to fending off the devil's attacks, persevering through the hard times, and remaining strong for my children and family.

If you desire to follow God and truly want to live for Christ so that everything you do brings glory to God, put on the armor of God!  Get ready.  Be prepared.  There will be persecution, ridicule, opposition, hard times, and attacks.  Don't give up.  Don't lose hope.  Stay faithful.  Yes, the cost of following Christ is high, but it does not compare to the cost of not following Him.  I would rather live in this world with persecution for my faith in Christ and opposition for my willingness to follow his plan, knowing that I have the Spirit of God in me, than live this life without persecution and without knowing and experiencing God's astounding love and grace.


Matthew 7:13-14, Matthew 7:21-23, Matthew 28:18-20, Luke 9:23, John 16, 2 Timothy 3:12, Proverbs 3:5-6, Jeremiah 29:11

Redeemed

Well...I DID IT!!  I got the tattoo (and managed not to scream or cry during the process) and I LOVE it!! 

Nervous?!?  Not at all...  (ha!)

The pain was intense.  I don't know how anyone can put themselves through that multiple times.  We will see if I get the "addiction" everyone warned me about.  As of right now...no way do I plan to endure that pain again!!

Redeemed

But the LORD will redeem those who serve him.  No one who takes refuge in him will be condemned.  Psalm 34:22

Got Ink?

Inked. Tatted up. Branded. Whatever your decide to call it, people get tattoos every day for many different reasons. For most, it's something meaningful and a way of expressing themselves. Others it was just the "cool thing" to do at the time.

I personally don't have a tattoo...yet.

I've wanted to get a tattoo for quite some time but haven't found anything that I could live with permanently. I've googled, I've gone into the parlor a few times, and I've had people tell me things to get. My indecisiveness kept me from ever doing it. Smart, I know. All this time I've been looking for something cool....some kind of symbol to represent me. I've looked at Hebrew, Incan, and Chinese symbols for "mother" and "mercy", or something to represent my mission trip to Peru, but nothing ever jumped out at me. Today I went online and looked again, thinking that just maybe there was a new symbol or design created since the last time I checked. (what can I say...I'm an optimistic dreamer! Ha!). Right as I began my search for the design that is to be forever branded on my body, I stopped and realized I had forgotten to put on my "I am Second" bracelet this morning (something I never take off). I started thinking about how many times I have had the opportunity to share my testimony and the meaning of that bracelet. When people see it and ask what it stands for, I'm able to tell them about how awesome my God is, how He has forgiven me, and how I strive to put Him first in every area of my life. That black bracelet brings glory to God. I had an overwhelming feeling of gratefulness. How awesome it is that God has redeemed a sinner like me and loves me so much that He let his son pay the price for MY sins. (John 3:16)

Redeemed.

That's it. No cool design. No interesting language (that I more than likely can't pronounce, much less read!). Just clear and simple: Redeemed. That's what I want to see every day for the rest of my life. A reminder to me and a statement to all that by His great and unfailing love and mercy I have been redeemed. With that one word tattoo, I hope to have the opportunity to share God's word and the work he is doing in my life.


Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. Psalm 103:1-4

#27

I just celebrated my 27th birthday and in doing so I've acquired 3+ gray hairs and stress. Yea...how about that for a birthday gift from myself. Don't worry...I'll stop now with the complaining and pity party!

Earlier this week I decided I was going to treat myself to a weekend getaway...solo. Yes, by myself. Earlier this month I went to Houston to visit Phillip, and since he was in training, the majority of my weekend was spent poolside reading. With that short and quiet weekend, not only was I able to read an entire book in less than a day, but I was also able to do a lot of thinking and praying. Not that I can't do all that at home, but it is way different to be out of the routine and be able to just clear my mind and spend hours in quiet time and studying God's word or praying to Him to give me guidance. I came back refreshed and renewed. It was no fancy vacation or anything; I was at a standard hotel airport. The location didn't matter, it was the time. I may be redundant in saying this but that weekend did wonders for me spiritually as well as in my relationships and outlook on my life.

In saying all that...I'm sitting in Houston waiting to board a plane to my destination. I've got two books to read and an open mind asking God to open my heart and renew my spirit as I spend the weekend devoted to spending time in His word and slipping in a little relaxation in there:)

When I got off the plane from Little Rock I was planning on going to Savannah however when I got to the part in the terminal where I was to turn left...I decided to go right. You see, Phillip listed me on a Savannah flight as well as a flight to Kansas City, Missouri. He is working this weekend and his overnight is in Kansas City. I came to a point in the terminal where I had to choose...the cute historic city of Savannah, Georgia with a nearby beach or Kansas City where he would be greeting me at the gate. Yup, I turned right and chose a few extra hours of airport sitting and am Kansas City bound!!! I'm sure I can find a spa somewhere in this city!

Oh, Mercy me!

Before going to Peru, everyone on our team was asked to take a Spiritual Gifts Analysis to find out what our gift is.  Mine:  Showing Mercy and Pastor/Shepherd.  I was pretty much off the charts on mercy, which wasn't a surprise!  I've always found myself being able to show empathy towards others, understand, and/or comfort them.  I love people and I have a huge desire to be there for them.  I try to help in anyway I can, whether it be talking, inviting them to hang out, sharing stories of my past struggles I've overcome (as well as those I still battle with today), and praying for them.  


Recently, I've questioned if I were using my gift properly or "too much".  Can a person go overboard on trying to be there for someone?  Does there come a time where you just stop trying to invest your time or thoughts into someone?  Some say there is.  I, however, don't.  It's hard for me to think about giving up on someone and thinking of them as a "lost cause".  I don't think there is anyone who is a lost cause.  Everyone deserves someone to be there for them.  Again, would you say that is my extreme mercy talking?  


I've been turned down on hangout invites with friends more times in the past 6 months than in my entire 26 (almost 27) years I've been living.  I've dealt with random spurts of being completely ignored and avoided.  I've been told not to waste my time on certain people.  I've felt used.  Yet I still keep trying.  Maybe its time I take a step back, while continuing to pray and give it all to God.


btw, if you haven't done a Spiritual Gift analysis to find out what your spiritual gifts are, you can do it online here:  http://www.churchgrowth.org/cgi-cg/gifts.cgi

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.  If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Trusting God = Life Changing

Our final day at Casa del Aguila was a full one!  We woke up Thursday and got to work on finishing our painting projects with the help of the adorable Miss Martha Ann.  She is the daughter of Steve & Sheri Dyer, one of the missionary families at the orphanage.  She is such a vibrant and sweet spirited girl and was excited to help!

   Martha Ann aka "Michelangela"

She discovered a hidden talent of painting

Once we finished painting the guest house we had some free time to relax before the afternoon festivities.  The children had been practicing all week for the anniversary celebration for the school.  Families and children packed the stands at the school's outdoor play court.  The students preformed skits, dances, and we sang along to songs (well, attempted...they were in Spanish). We were able to interact with so many children and gave out tons more candy! There was an adorable little girl who walked up to me while I was sitting and watching the skits.  I smiled and said hello and she sat down next to me.  I knew she was eyeing the suckers I had in my hand!  I gave her a few and she got up and walked away.  I figured that was it.  But then she came back.  This time she sat closer to me and tried to talk.  Her name is Miriam and she is three-years-old.  Same age as my daughter, Kaitlin.  She was outgoing and sweet just like Kaitlin, too.  At one point she reached up and grabbed my cross necklace.  I said "Jesus" and she repeated it.  She sat with me and watched the dancing and skits for a little while longer before getting up again.  However, it wasn't long before she came back.  Each time she came back to sit with me, she would get closer.  This time she was leaning over my lap enjoying her sucker as she watched the performances.  She would turn and look at me or hold my hand occasionally.  It melted my heart.  Her clothes were soiled and wet and and her hair got stickier and stickier with every sucker I gave her!  But it didn't matter.  I saw an adorable little girl with whom I was able to share my love.  I wasn't able to communicate well with her because our translator wasn't able to make out what she was saying since she still had her "baby voice" as Gabby called it.  Regardless of the lack of verbal communication, I was able to love, hug, and hold Miriam.  

Meet Miriam.  

The adorable 3-year-old that I wanted to bring home with me!

After we left the school celebration, we had dinner and then headed to the midweek church service at the church on the farm.  We stood and clapped and I attempted to sing the songs, all in Spanish of course.  I notice the drummer of the band was one of the boys that was on my team during Oansa.  He stuck out on Tuesday night because he sang all the songs so enthusiastically and seemed so eager to learn his bible verses.  He nailed everything when he was quizzed.  I was impressed then, and even more so seeing him on stage playing the drums with the adult musicians!  

The upbeat music began to slow down and instead of hands clapping, they were raised in worship.  I couldn't tell you what the song was about or even tell you one word I sung and probably incorrectly pronounced.  What I can tell you is that God was in that room.  I closed my eyes, raised my hands, and worshiped Him.  I felt His presence and the emotions and gratitude began to flow.  I was so thankful and humbled that He would allow me to be there, with those people, and join in worshiping our God.  It was amazing.

Then it was Grober's time to speak.  I think Laura timed it to 13 minutes (correct me if I'm wrong).  Many of the children had fallen asleep during the hour and half singing.  Although it didn't seem to matter that the music was in Spanish, I was thankful that Grober had decided to preach in English, while Gabby translated for everyone else.  He spoke about trusting God.  One consequence was that you would miss out on what God had in store for you if you didn't trust Him.  Peru was evidence of that.  I didn't know what was in store for me or our group prior to leaving.  I didn't know how God would use me or even if He could.  I was scared to leave my kids for that long and to be that far away.  But I trusted God.  Had I not, I would have missed out on this life changing experience.

Grober speaking while Gabby translates

Praying for Chonta

We spent Wednesday at a village called Chonta.  It's a village at approximately 9500 feet with the people primarily being farmers or herdsmen.  The view from the village is breathtaking.

Chonta

There is a school with around 23 children and one teacher.  We had the opportunity to visit with the children and watch them as they sang songs for us in Quechua, their first language, and in Spanish.  One of our team members, Laura, is a nurse and was able to treat a few of the children for their wounds.  One little girl was scratching at her leg while she was standing in line singing and Laura noticed her and had her come over so she could check her wound.  The wound is in the process of becoming gangrene.  It was heartbreaking to see these children with the sores and wounds on their hands and feet and not having the resources to tend to them.  This little girl could be at risk of losing her leg if it weren't caught in time!  Laura treated the wound and administered meds as well as left another dose in hopes it will tie her over until the medical mission team arrives on the 14th.

We gave the kids candy and Debbie and I rubbed some moisturizing repair lotion on their faces.  There was one little boy that kept watching me while they were doing their singing and dancing but I couldn't get him to wave back.  After I applied the lotion to his little cheeks his face lit up!

After visiting with the children we all surrounded them and laid our hands on them as Jana prayed.  She prayed for their health, education, safety, and food.  

The children in Chonta lined up to sing for us

We continued on through the village and stopped at a home where a brother and sister lived.  Their home was made of the same adobe brick as the other homes in the village.  They had chickens scattered around their small fenced in area.  We continued to walk up towards the door and notices tons of flies and to our surprise there was raw meat laying out on a building being dried to store.  (They don't have fridges, microwaves, etc.  They have electricity which primarily consists on a single light bulb in their small home with dirt floors.)  As we walked up I watch this tiny elderly woman walking down the hill towards us with a crutch.  She was was very accepting of our company and embraced us with hugs as we introduced ourselves.  Then the pastor of the church in the village told us their story.  She was blind in one eye and partially blind in the other and had previously had surgery.  He had surgery for a hernia.  When asked how old they were she replied by saying between 70 and 80-years-old.  We took our hands and place them on both of them as we circled around them.  Then we each prayed for them, with the pastor following with a prayer in Quechua.

We walked to the next house of a woman named Nancy.  The pastor asked us to pray for her because she has been baptized but hasn't been attending church.  This lady was also the mother of the child with the wound.  The pastor gave her the medicine and we gathered around her and each prayed.  I prayed that she sees God's love through us and through her people and that she would be led back to church, as well as for their health and safety.

The short walk to those two houses was God-awesome.  To be able to share God's love and see His people in need and have the amazing opportunity to place my hands on them and pray to OUR God was incredible.  No matter how different we may be on the outside or how different our lifestyles are...God loves us all and hears our prayers.  To be used by God to pray for those people in need and being willing to let Him use me and let His light shine through me was life-changing.  

Once we finished with lunch we began our hike into the Andes.  It was a pretty intense hour and a half to get to our final destination but I felt very adventurous:)  We stopped at a point in the mountains to see the comadors.  These birds have around a 9 foot wing span.  As we sat there and waited for them to come, I just looked around at all of God's beauty and reflected on the visit with the people in Chonta.

 A cross at the beginning of our hike

The visit and evangelism with the people and hiking about 5 miles was an amazing day here in Peru!!  I don't think I even noticed the danger of the winding road in the dark as we drove down the mountain leaving Chonta!

Sunset over Chonta, Peru